Introduction
This is something I have been feeling for a while now, that
I didn't really know who I was or I couldn't find an identity within myself. I
have been thinking and searching a lot and last week talking to my teacher my
conclusion is that our identity is really "no-identity".
No-Identity as our Identity
That of the "no-identity" should be understood as the
lived experience of the consciousness, of our own awareness peering into itself
experiencing, understanding, perceiving the great mystery of ourselves as
"no-identity". So our identity is us carrying around the experience
of our awareness or consciousness peering into that vastness of consciousness
inside of us and perceiving a mystery there but knowing still that you 'are',
that you are a reality in life, that you are a ray or spark or stream of life.
Further Confirmation and application
I asked someone with a great deal of consciousness and
experience in these studies about whether the consciousness has an identity and
he said “no”. Because an identity is a concept, a role, a function, a belief
and the consciousness does not have any of those things.
This to me makes sense because say when someone is
criticizing us and if we go to that "no-identity" state then it is
heaps easier to handle because if we have our identity as Paul, the nice guy, tried
to do the best job but unbeknownst got it wrong and shouldn't get talked to so
hard etc. etc., it is really much more difficult to not get defensive and react
etc. For me the "no-identity" part makes the dissolution of the ego
more possible, especially for Pride, because the essence can't get humiliated,
it is very hard to humiliate or put down awareness or consciousness, but an
identity can be put down, ridiculed etc.
Real Identity in the Being
I have been also thinking about the Being as being our real
identity, I asked my teacher about that one too and he said that the identity
of the Being is really like a nature and a function at this level in creation
for us to understand it, but outside of creation He is no form, no identity,
consciousness, just pure energy of the highest degree, absolute immortality,
origin unknown - maybe of no origin etc. That of knowing the ray of the Being
is great but it left me a little like wanting more, like in the end the ray of
the Being in our mind is just a string of words, there are heaps of Monads
belonging to the same ray and then still one doesn't really know His identity -
I imagine it has to be experienced somehow. Anyway I'm still got more to work
out about that one maybe with an experience one day it will gel together.
Conclusion
As the essence we can quite practicably realise or discover
that our identity is ‘no-identity’ and dwell in that freedom. As for the
identity of the Being that has to be experienced in higher, much higher states
of consciousness where our consciousness fuses with His, i.e. in the fourth
state of consciousness the awakened consciousness.
End (280).
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