About Needing the Love of Others and When Others Say “I need Your Love or I Can’t Live Without You” – (2371)

Self-Remembering

As soon as we believe a statement like the one above ("I need your love") we leave the state of self-remembering, in other words we leave our essence and the connection to our Being and we enter into suffering (even as beautiful as it may seem to say that to someone it kind of hurts becasue it is blocking out our own Being).

Such beliefs and feelings come from an ego. And all egos are a lie! No ego is fully valid, authentic and real. Those qualities are reserved for the Real Being. The ego is not the Real Being.

The masters before us have dissolved all of their egos including the one that thought that way mentioned above. So our thoughts and feelings that are along the same lines as what I have mentioned above can also be dissolved and that means that they are simply not true!

But they feel so true and valid don’ they? And that is exactly what causes the big part of the pain that we feel. So we have to use our inner psychological force to get the message to our subconscious that these thoughts are not true!

In other words, do not allow yourself and your subconscious to believe that you need the love of another. Understanding why you don't need their love and deepening that understanding reaches and transforms our subconscious.

Typically in this state of affairs we also feel that we are not needed, not important, useless, debased and flawed to the core, that we are not worthy of anyone’s love, and we think about how they would suffer or not suffer if we were gone… etc. Such feelings come from the need to be loved and having failed in attaining the love or the impression of the love that we wanted from them. If it happens that another received he love that we wanted then jealousy enters into play.

If I may say this, such an interior state is to be in a corner of our own abyss and to also vibrate with a certain circle of the Earth’s abyss. Forget I said that, it doesn’t really help does it?

Remedy

The remedy is self-remembering. We have all that we need in our Being or in simple terms inside of ourselves.

(You may be saying: "stuff you and self-remembering" – I would like to say that what always matters much more than getting sick is getting better again. You don’t really want more bitterness, you want to feel fine again and there is a soothing remedy available)

The Being in us is the reason for our existence, so doesn’t it make sense that everything that we could ever need or even ever need to find reside in It – our Being? And if this is true for us it is also exactly true for every other human being. All that we need is in your Being, and we only in our Being are we complete. We are not complete in another person.

Are we are Important to Others?

When we are in the grip of a negative state that thinks in the above mentioned ways, we think that we are not important to the one that we wish loves us. We think this all because once again we are believing that we need their love. Once again that is not true, we do not need their love. The other person’s love can have a high value for us but it is not a necessity for our body to continue living or for our Being to continue on being. Our Being is independent of that.

The proof of the latter statement is that we were born and lived ok before we even knew that this person existed. It is only a psychologically impersonated need.

What we do need though is the reversal in relativity and duality of this feeling of not being important to anyone.

Exact Remedy

Reversing it we arrive at the following statement which is that we need to make the Being in us important to us. This is the exact opposite, this is the exact remedy that we need to apply on the spot to remedy these painful feelings. Or in meditation or prayer.

As soon as we make the Being important in us and for us once again we enter into self-remembering and all is set straight, all proportions are correct and harmony inside of ourselves can begin to sound its balanced and peaceful melody. And we can also smile a genuine smile. Not a smile that yells out from our background: “help me”, because there, is still within us is a mixture of painful emotion and a kind of impotence and disappointment. Impotence, because we can not fix ourselves, and disappointment, because we are not getting the impression that we wish for from the person.

Making the Being in us important for us we are fixing ourselves so the feeling of impotence goes and the feeling of disappointment goes too because we realise that we do not need that impression. The ego that needs that assurance or verification is not correct or true.

Conclusion

We need to make the Being in us important to us! The key is our own heart. If the Being is important to us in our heart then we are important to the Being and It is important to us.

We really have no hope trying and wanting to be important to others. We may be for a second but we can not make it so for long and never ever all the time. Because they have their Being and their Being is the most important thing to them.

I also want to give here a prelude to the next post which is that love for the other blossoms beautifully when our Being is more important to us and we want that the Being in the other person to be more important to them than us.

End (2371)