Something to eliminate...
When things don't go to plan, or things begin to unfold into a mess or semi-mess, out comes the 'should have' reprimand.
We 'should have' left earlier, we 'should have' thought of that, we 'should have' taken that freeway exit instead of that one etc.etc.
Well it is all too late mate, and no matter how wise the 'should have' is, it is still not going to help the situation very much.
Often the 'should have' reprimand makes things worse... The 'should have' reprimand can become a bad habit and it is the main reason why angers appears in a person. In anger we say 'should have'.
It is worth eliminating...
What helps me to eliminate the 'should have' reprimand, which is I repeat, the reason that anger and annoyance use to appear, is to radically accept the circumstances of the 'now' and to feel trust that I can help to improve them or get through them as they are, not how they should be.
The 'should have' comes from our fixed mental structures...
The 'should have' reprimand is not practical action, and disconnects one from the now, and keeps one in one's own mind arguing.
Working the 'should have' will loosen up your mind and will keep you more in the now, make you less angry, make you more flexible and make you an asset to people in difficulties.
No one wants a person saying you 'should have' done this, done that, when you're in a hole and just want to get out!
End (3351).
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