Here are just some notes that I have been going over and are working wioth. I have not mastered them but are working with them.
The real control is self-control.
We can try hard to control others and circumstances but things always tend to slip out of our control. There's always something that slips out of our control.
Controlling others does not make others feel happy.
We control others because we lack control of over our own emotions.
Controlling is mainly done out of fear, self-importance, pride etc.
To be controlling of others or circumstances is at one point going to casue us suffering.
Self-control is certainly a big value or virtue. A value that has to be worked on to acquire.
Self-control starts with knowing that we are responsible for what we feel and think.
Self-control is both of the body, what happens inside the body and of our psychology or mind.
We can not ignore our mind or our psychology if we want self-control. We can control our mind by cultivating the capacity to let thoughts and points of view go.
The super important thing is to let things go. I find what helps the most is to let thoughts to go not to think about the thoughts or get muddled into the thoughts to try and modify or control them but to really let them go without thinking about doing it - just lwet them go. To use the out breath to let the thoughts go helps a lot as well.
A relaxed mind or quiet mind is a mind under control.
End (4191).
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