Some Issues that Make Us Oversensitive (185)

Introduction

This post includes describes some of the issues that can make us quite sensitive in our psychology and of course when these sensitive buttons in us are touched we react quite strongly.

We are not Loved

We could feel that and perhaps this issue of not being loved brings us to a state of worry and any other impressions that we receive after that we could take in a way that the other person does not love us, makes us very reactive.

We are scared about losing someone or the love of someone, because we need them for something. It could be that without them we feel that we can’t be happy in life, that we can’t do someone sort of task or job, like raise the children, run a business etc. etc. The Question is that we Think that we Need them.

Why Does it Hurt not Being Loved?

Lets go into not being loved. Why does it hurt when think that we are not loved? We don’t demand love from everybody but we may demand that people in general like us or we may even demand neutrality. Certainly we never demand that people dislike or hate us.

It is like we are missing something when others dislike us or don’t want us. We feel a sense of failure, that something didn’t go right or well for this to happen. We can’t deny past lives though and mechanical antipathy in others and the egos or defects of other people which we are not responsible for. We have a sense though that we have to do something to make it right, that it is a burden that it is a stone in our shoes that we have to smooth over.

Our Pride is the Culprit

It is our Pride that gets upset when we are not treated respectfully. We have a belief that we should be treated respectfully. When we are not we try to confront it or correct. We think immediately that there is something wrong with me. That what I am is not worthy of respect that I am guilty of something. So I need to balance it, that is the way that we try to bring a solution, we balance it either outside (disrespecting the person back) or inside of ourselves, by seeing that we are not diminished, that we are not the perception that we have of ourselves.

Why do to deal with that and others don’t have to, that people dislike me. To feel first and above others to feel cosy and warm and loved. What about to feel loved without the feeling of being more loved or the favourite. Not to take that love into relativity. The problem comes when we feel loved less and that is what pride is all about.

Relative Love or Love with Pride

We have created a lot of these loves on being relative on being the most or best to the person. We may do many things that we think are things that others can not do for them, so we should get the most love the best of everything from them.

The result is that we have set up that relationship based on pride, that we are the best giver and friend and lover to that person and so naturally we demand that they see things that way too. We have a belief that we should be seen that way. However, that is not true, we may but we can’t guarantee that others do. We have our relationship with that person based on the fact that we are the best for them that we do the most and that we are the best. The ones most worthy for or of their love and so we try to control things so that that happens or that they see things that way. We even try to control their way of seeing us and we get very jealous and we have the belief that we should be given the most attention.

Conclusion

So our relationship has been set up on the best and not on love. We have to transcend that of not having to be more. Allow the love that we have to give and if it is more than ok. Sometimes it won’t be. We think that if I don’t give more I won’t be liked. That is not true.

End (185).