Remedy
The following point of work is very effective to counter the
feeling of ‘less’ that is at the centre of jealousy.
It at first may seem wrong or too hard to do but trust me,
doing it will provide you with a relieving balm.
Appreciate the Value of the Threatening Other
We must start by looking at the person we are jealous of and
then reflect earnestly seeing all their values. When we begin to sincerely see
the values in the other person we slowly start to appreciate these values and
then appreciate that person.
This by the way diminishes the ill-will so ever present in jealousy.
This also directly counters the angry feeling in jealousy because we then see
in some way why they deserve some affection or deserve to be liked.
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| Don't worry men do exactly the same. This is the ill-will part of jealousy that looks for the failings of the other person, when we should reverse this and look for values of the person so as to escape jealousy. The ill-will keeps us stuck in jealousy. |
But Why Do This?
But more importantly, appreciating the value in the other
opens the door for us to be able to appreciate the values in ourselves and that
directly counters the ‘less’ feeling of jealousy.
This works because when we are in the grip of the ‘less’
feeling of jealousy it is obvious that we are not appreciating or considering
the fact that we have our values. We forget all about our values and our self-image
or the way that we perceive ourselves points downwards.
Recognising our values points our self-image or the way that
we perceive ourselves from downwards to slightly upwards or to what is real.
Then logically we will feel differently to the way that the ‘less’ makes us
feel.
Conclusion
Give this point of work a try, right in the very moment that you feel the "I" of jealousy bight the hardest. Remember for it to be
effective, one must do it on purpose and do it honestly and sincerely.
End (1979).
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