Monday, 3 August 2020

Fantasy Post: Upset with Me Fantasy - (3749)

There is this type of disconcerting fantasy as well...

Where it goes like we begin a fantasy after a person does get upset with us or it looks like they are upset with us.

When they are upset the 'upset fantasy' makes things worse by projecting all sorts of drama and abandonment, rejection and falling out and not talking and events having to be changed etc. etc.  

When they look like they are upset this aspect of fantasy produces all sorts of uncomfortable emotions as well.

It would make emotional life so much simpler if we did not have this fantasy. 

It is always better to focus on reality and keep our psychological processes very close to and aligned with reality.


We can remember reality! Remembering that we are friends and that we have passed through a lot of 'stuff' beforehand and come out ok or better for it even. They will cool down, and overcome it and so will we. Things pass, things flow onwards, other things become more important. The flow of life is greater and more grandiose than a silly upset between two people.

The work can fix it, we can certainly work on ourselves we know that and we can make changes to make the situation better.

The worst bit of this fantasy is that we project all sorts of unpleasant things and usually none of this comes to pass but our own fantasy scares us or worries us or upsets us or angers us.

Definitely it is worth not following this fantasy and sticking to reality. So often they are doing all that they did for us but are upset and yet we go with the fantasy thinking they will stop but right now they are doing it but being angry but they are still doing, helping etc.

End (3749).

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