Fantasy Posts: Cats Spew your Slippers and People Judge - (3698)

Smug looking oily slick midnight cats in Melbourne lock-down

There are not just the typical fantasies of escape: winning the lottery, buying a mansion etc. but many very everyday beliefs, which produce significant suffering in our life.

Beliefs such as: people shouldn't judge, people shouldn't get angry, people should always be professional and polite, the cat should spew on the tiles not the carpet, friends shouldn't talk behind our back, the boss should defend our project, people should see I'm tired, people should see I'm not 100% well, our prayers should be answered, I should meditate more, I should be better... are all fantasies!

In general whenever a should appears, we are in the fumes of fantasy.

The fumes of fantasy make us feel stress and cause us to suffer.

What is real is happening, it is what is, in the real there is no should. It is there already before the should. 

When 'the should' is about others, it is truer that 'we should'. For example, in the fantasy: 'others should see I'm tired" it is truer that I should see that I am tired and tell them I'm tired and make other arrangements, or realise that it is a fantasy - they won't see that I'm tired and I should just suck it up and do it.

When 'the should' is about ourselves, like: 'I should practice more', it is clear that we shouldn't, how can we? We are doing what we are. Then we know that with practice comes the new, so we go to practice. Here we are not fantasizing, thinking we should practice more, we are acting. Fantasy does not act, the consciousness in us acts.  

End (3698).