Introduction a Definition of Intimacy
Certainly, it is very difficult to deny that intimacy is a
part of sexuality. Within sexuality there is intimacy on all three levels. On
the physical, psychological and esoteric levels.
Not Only Present in Sexuality
Intimacy is also not only present in sexuality. It can be
present in friendships, i.e. among friends and it can also be present within
one’s relationship with oneself. Intimacy certainly does imply relating.
Many people are not intimate with themselves. They very
frequently go within themselves and search their intimate depths for answers
and advice. Most people have a superficial relationship with themselves, they
only relate to the sensations of the body and the thoughts coming from their
personality and egos.
Inner Reality
Intimacy may also be seen from the point of view of being
acquainted with what is beyond the surface, that is to be acquainted with one’s
inner processes, which some people may regard as private. We may say that
intimacy is to make contact with one’s inner reality.
What is needed to access and express one’s inner reality, is
honesty or sincerity. This is the base of intimacy which is present in
sexuality. So then, in sexuality we find intimacy, honesty, trust. With lust
and its egos being the opposite of true sexuality we find a sexuality operating
in a dishonest, distrusting and non-intimate way. Adultery is an example of
this when lust is dishonest and breaks trust. People hide many of their lustful
actions because they know they ae not honest.
Lust Lies through Fantasy and its Ideas and Proposals to Us
Observe how lust is not honest. With the fantasies of lust
we lie to ourselves. Because our fantasies are not going to happen, and us
believing them is to believe a lot of lies. The ego of lust presents with the
lie that they will happen or could happen. Realistically speaking very little of
the fantasies of people come true.
Intimacy is Honesty
When we are intimate with someone we reveal honestly and
sincerely our inner processes, that is our real thoughts, longings, feelings
etc. When we are with someone else it is wise to reveal the “good” side of
ourselves, which is also the deeper side, the side of our essence. The love or
affection we feel, the yearnings for positive change, the preoccupations that
we have etc. The “bad” side we can reveal to others but with the purpose to ask
for help or to make something better, or just to be honest but not to attack,
or shock or hurt.
Mostly though we reveal the ‘bad” side of ourselves to
ourselves so to transform these negative elements. With another to be intimate
is to connect to our essence and to reveal some of the things that it contains.
If the other person realises this, then they will appreciate this and reciprocate
with something from their essence. This is then intimacy.
Intimacy and Meaning
Intimacy leads to meaning and it is what makes sexuality
meaningful. This then impresses the essence in us and brings happiness, peace,
trust and other values.
Within the true sexuality there is meaning.
Lust on the other hand lacks meaning. It brings emptiness
and that brings sadness. It seeks people that it does not even know or seeks
people that it only knows superficially. How can there be meaning in such an
encounter.
Intimacy in Sexuality Extends to the Beings
During the sexual act where both parties are focussing on
their inner Being, there is a connection to the Beings occurring. The
transmuted energy forms a link of communication between the two Beings. I ask
then what is more intimate then that. The two inner most realities of two people
in contact, in communication.
This we know does not happen in the sexual act conditioned by
lust. There is no transmutation and therefore no link between the Monads of the
two people. Therefore, there is not that true intimacy occurring. Lust is against
intimacy, meaning etc.
Conclusion - Lust is Not Intimate
If we observe all the ways lust acts we come to the conclusion
that it is not intimate. Is it? No!
The fact that lust is not intimate, tells us that it is not: meaningful, fulfilling, honest,
trustworthy, connecting, deep, capable of bringing good results or capable of
building up anything strong and firm within us and capable of connecting us
more to our inner Being.
Lust is not honest. Let me ‘go to town’ here and show
exactly what I mean with all the examples that I can conjure up in my head and
which I have time to write.
Sorry
Sorry, I am out of time just now. Have to run. But I promise
to finish this post off. I think it is better to post this 75% complete then
not at all. Stay tuned… to be finished in post number 1806.
End (1805).
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