Because it is not Real Love
When we love ourselves through others, that is feel well,
nice, warm and fuzzy with ourselves when others love us, say nice affectionate
and meaningful things to us, kiss us, hug us etc. that way of loving ourselves will
turn against us and provide us with pain, as great as the nice, warm
fuzzy feelings were, the greater the pain we will feel.
This is because that way of loving ourselves is really not the
right way and what is right and true, or absolute or in the Being, does not
change from pleasure to pain. Loving ourselves through others is not real love,
it is not freedom for ourselves nor for the other person. It obliges the other
person a lot and makes ourselves to feel pain all the time, that is not real love.
The Right Way
The right way to love ourselves is from ourselves, by
ourselves and for ourselves. This is the absolute way and that way that depends
on us and our Being and not on others. When we properly love ourselves we can
love others consciously and not have that surprise of our own apparent love
turning into pain against ourselves.
Conclusion - Bases
We also don’t create false bases, which are really the bases
in others that can fall out under our feet, leaving us to feel very empty and
paining which turns to strong resentment. Resentment because, we created that
base as an unspoken sign of trust to them or as a way to say “I trust you and I
trust you so much or so intimately that I am going to create a base in you, and
I hope that you notice I am doing this”. Now this may seem very nice and loving
and trusting but it turns out to jump back up and bite us hard. We must create
bases in our Being not in anyone or something else.
This is really such a huge piece of wisdom, that is
overlooked all the time and can seem to generalised or synthesised and
difficult to apply, but it is so true and it really is part of conscious love.
If you want to love consciously do not create bases in the other person!
End (710).
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